From bad dreams to…loneliness? How did I make that leap?

So, I had a bad dream last night.

It wasn’t the kind you have when you’re little with monsters and ghosts chasing you; and it wasn’t the kind discussed between Sophie and the Big Friendly Giant in Roald Dahl‘s beloved book where you either wake up sweating or screaming.

Oh no.

This was the kind where you wake up crying. I’m not going to go into detail about it but let’s just say it involved somebody who is very close to me and it was just too realistic. It was kind of weird. I mean, I knew it was a dream but it was realistic in the sense that this was something that could happen in real life. That dream was kind of woven with another dream, which was what made me realize it was a dream to begin with. It was a very strange experience.

I’m not the type of person who analyzes their dreams and tries to figure out what they mean but this was just too bizarre–and unnerving–for me. So, when I finally stopped crying after I woke up, I couldn’t just brush it off and be done with it. I felt that I had to do something. I looked at the clock and realized that it was only 7:30 in the morning. And since I’m in Idaho and pretty much all of my family and friends are in Washington, that put the person in my dream at 6:30. Way too early to call. I waited until a reasonable hour to call. I called and talked to this person and was assured that they were okay and doing well. It put my mind at ease.

This got me thinking about how far out of touch I’ve been feeling lately with people back home and just people in general. Obviously, I’m a bit out of touch with people back home because I don’t see them on a regular basis. I mean, I call them and they call me all the time, but it’s not exactly the same. I don’t see them on a regular basis and I think I’m starting to feel it more now that it’s the holiday season (this was my first Thanksgiving away from home). I’m also feeling out of touch with people in general because I spend way too much time at my apartment watching the Food Network or at Barnes and Noble on my own. And I have yet to see Twilight…who wants to see it with me?!

The bottom line is, I’m kind of getting lonely here. I mean, it’s nice here and the people I work with are great, but I miss my family and friends back home. I need to make friends here outside of the people I work with. I don’t really spend much time with them outside of work anyway. A friend of mine seems to be going through this back home and she told me she’s been looking on Craig’s List for friends (strictly platonic since she has a boyfriend). I think I may look into this as well.

I don’t know. We’ll see. I’ve never really been one to reach out and try to initiate a friendship. I’m actually pretty shy when it comes to this kind of stuff. This probably explains my single status–hell not probably, it does explain my single status.

Okay, so that was a kind of depressing post. Hopefully my next one will be a bit more uplifting. But for now, I’ll wallow in my emo-ness (I’m from Seattle, remember?)



2 comments on “From bad dreams to…loneliness? How did I make that leap?

  1. It works =) I have pen pals. It keeps me sane and gives me a reason to check my email all the time.

    I miss you.

  2. […] From bad dreams to…loneliness? how did i make that leap? – It’s always nice to have a “poor me” moment every now and then. This was mine. […]

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